cranax - cranberry flavored xanax

Show thread


Stop saying "just do x"

Nobody "just" does a thing.

so seriously hear me out

taquitos, right? but use a ziti instead

I have this idea for a pop-up pizza restaurant in Q4 


The Hut For Red October

cursed food 

Have leftover tomato paste?

Wrap it in wax paper, twist at the ends like taffy, put in zipper bag and freeze.

Then beat the heat with a tasty tomato treat!

While you're on lockdown, why not also lockdown your Linux laptop with safeboot? It adds UEFI SecureBoot + Yubikey hardware platform keys + Signed kernel/initrd + TPM sealed disk encryption + SIP-like root filesystem protection to Ubuntu 20.04. safeboot.dev/

the uh,

technical term for what you've got there is


Which is worse?


( technically this was a shitpost but shitting in a pot is worse than this post so i just left it )

Show thread


The year is 20XX. IMDB has invented technology which lets them scan your brain for what you've been watching so they can show you a headshot of the performers as they appeared in that show

bread is just wrought flour forged in an oven


the baker is the blacksmith's friend


the quarantine has forced people to be creative. for example, if you take

rotary lemons (regular won't work)
and zest them with some spices (i recommend the six-way trinity)
and then season a borlat roast

350 degrees (in the old measurement) or setting four on your Hattori-Brown Cooks-All, for 43 intervals per kilo.

Serve with sojon gravy, garnish with spearbeans. Accompany with your favorite starch or vegetable.

I have noticed an increase in birds now that everyone is inside. It makes me feel like I should own a pair of binoculars again so I can see them up close.

Tired: Antidepressants that come with feelies, a la Infocom.

Wired: Antidepressants _are_ feelies for your brain.

Blaming a pandemic on bats is something The Joker would do

Show more
Mastodon @ SDF

"I appreciate SDF but it's a general-purpose server and the name doesn't make it obvious that it's about art." - Eugen Rochko