'Why has the 'Queen's Speech' been moved from Christmas Day ?'

The Eggball World Cup - the culmination of 4 years hard work by players and coaches and yet qualification to the knockout stages is determined by, err, the weather.

For non English/Manc folk, Johnny Marr meant 'mess with people, joke with people, have a laugh with people' as opposed to the literal translation of 'fuck' or the violent interpretation ('I'm gonna fuck you up, innit')

I just love that long haired George wearing his pyjamas comes on and plays the intricate intro to 'This Charming Man' so brilliantly. It's almost as though it was fixed. And when Marr puts his arm round his shoulder.

'And do you know where George is from ? Yeah - Manchester' 🙂

I have written to Tammy Abraham with a formal apology.

OGS - 'We need to find a solution. We’ve got to make the decision to see if this is the way to keep going [tactically].'

I'd love to know what the current tactical approach is - I don't see pressing, I don't see the pace and energy (that OGS promised), I don't see possession based football, I don't see sitting deep and rapid counter-attacking.

What I do see is Mata running round like an rather aimless chicken (with head attached) and Fred and Perreira contributing less then nothing.

'You know that people from Manchester fuck with people all the time, right ?'


I used to really anticipate and enjoy United games with a few beers during the action.

Now, it's got so bad, I'm pre-loading in order to dull the pain and anxiety of facing the might Newcastle away.

That honeymoon period seems a distant memory now.

Mind you, I've worked on many classic Waterfall software projects that failed and the closing weeks were characterised by escalations, people banging their fists on tables culminating in daily (and occasionally hourly) status updates to 'get the job done'.

These status calls often ran for 45 minutes which became rather self-defeating.

Lad started at new job. People are friendly, welcoming, knowledgeable and his 10 day induction program is comprehensive, interesting and useful.

However, he tells me they have '1 week sprints'. We use Agile (sort of) but our sprints are typically 4-6 weeks.

Is a 1 week sprint normal ? Seems like the user stories would have to be so trivial as to be meaningless or just quick bug fixes with lots of stories falling into Backlog (next sprint). Weird.

I know MUFC have their own problems but Granit Xhaka epitomises Arsenal. Thinks he's some soft of hard man (but isn't). Think he's better than he is. Goes missing more than Lord Lucan.

I especially enjoyed it when he hauled Lingard down by the neck in the lead up to the Utd goal. Then, after arm waving and protesting his innocence, he eventually regained his position - only to place his hands behind his back and nod his head down watching the ball scream past him into the net.

'Sure, I’ll carry on plodding for the foreseeable future'.

I, increasingly have similar feelings.


Hang on I thought these MP's were gagging at the leash, dying to return to Parliament to provide scrutiny and in-depth questioning of Brexit progress.

But no, just the normal, immature, public school common room bawling, grandstanding and petty insults.

Cunts, the lot of them.

Just watching a 'Redwood UI' presentation from OpenWorld. The smoke and mirrors version of HR and expenses bears no resemblance to what we are all currently using.

I insist on being touched up within the next month, damnit !

...I begged and urged him to install any 3rd party virus scanners, trials or software on magazine disk or other 'FREE DOWNLOADS'.

Sadly he'd ignored this and installed (perhaps even purchased Avast Anti-Virus Pro) which was spinning his disk constantly at 100%. This meant using the machine and troubleshooting or even firing a browser up like swimming through treacle.

'Is it always this damned slow ?'

'Oh yeah - it's always been a bit sluggish.

...did he know the ISP mail account credentials. No - much searching of scraps of paper that resembled parchment and manuals where he firsdt recorded them 10 years so.

Finally, resolved by a complete uninstall and reinstall. Couldn't even create a new Mail account.

3) Reinstated Google Chrome to the Taskbar because 'it always lived there and suddenly one day, (in his parallel Universe), it spontaneously combusted'

4) 5 years ago, when he purchased his new shiny Lenovo Windows 10 machine...

An otherwise pleasant weekend in leafy Cheshire was spoiled by paternal technical issues:-

1) Some fucking, annoying idiotic notification when he starts his iPhone SE (Senior Edition) - something related to iCloud login. As my sister and nice brother--in-law urged me to purchase this pile of crap, I told him to live with it until Xmas.

2) Thunderbird couldn't connect to his ISP's Mail server. Somehow, God knows how, he had corrupted the Thunderbird profile or the password manager store.....

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